I want to be left alone - TV and magazine interviews on exactly why, to follow.

Why...

Do some people who shriek for privacy, remind me of a quote from Hamlet, The lady doth protest too much, me thinks”. In days gone by, certain people really meant it when they withdrew from the limelight.  Every female mimic in the world vamps us as Greta Garbo famously saying “Dahlink, I vant to be left alone”. The difference then was the Swedish icon stuck to it. No frantic interviews as to why she wanted to pull away from the public, an oxymoron of an event if ever there was one. She retreated to Manhattan and her art collection. Manhattan! Can you imagine that? No seeking out the paparazzi and in the one of the most publicity hungry cities on earth. At the height of her fame and beauty she had decided to retreat from the world, possibly due to the negative reviews of The Two Faced Woman. She was 36. The title of that failed movie is pretty ironic when you look at the two-faced women since, who have protested their desire for privacy but who continue seeking the limelight and would attend even the opening of a fridge.

...and another thing

Clearly the recent years of chest thumping by the Duke and Duchess of Sussex is the apogee of wanting to be left alone then giving thousands of interviews as to why. The thing is, as a member of the public, I wish to goodness they would leave me alone!

Much as I suspect from the evidence and accounts given by others, the Sussexes public self flagellation is mostly either of their own making or due to their version of the truth, it’s the seeming hypocrisy of seeking solitude and relief from the paparazzi, then assiduously courting it, that sticks in my throat.

They of course join a long list of ‘vant-to-be-left-aloners’ who would actually be distraught if their every word was not considered as nectar from the Gods.

...and another thing

Sometimes even those who genuinely are reclusive in nature, try to protect their privacy so much it backfires. Such as the so-called Streisand effect. In 2003 singer Barbra Streisand took umbrage at an aerial photo of her Malibu Mansion popping up on Pictopia.com. They in turn had got it from the publicly available California Coastal Records Project, documenting coastal erosion.

La Streisand sued for $50m for violation of privacy. At the time before the lawsuit news broke, just six people, two being Barbra’s lawyers had downloaded the photo. After the news broke 420,000 people downloaded it! Ba-da-boom.

...and another thing

We also have the I’m-leaving-you-aloners’ who knowingly wink at us to say only kidding. Ol Blue ‘Eyes retired and came back more times than the Atlantic tide. All in all, a good idea and we enjoyed the game and the concerts.

Boxers on the other hand, once they hang up the gloves should be physically restrained from making a comeback…along with people who failed an America’s Got Talent audition. What makes anyone think that if they got rejected as a bad impersonator of a donkey, they will make it as a cack handed juggler of trashcan lids?

...and another thing

Then we have the ‘ I-honestly-never-meant-that-to-happen’ brigade. These I think are the saddest group of deniers of attention seeking. Who goes around with a star discreetly stuck over their nipple and then claim a ‘wardrobe malfunction’ as when Bieber and Janet Jackson were warbling at half time at the Super Bowl back in 2004 and her boob popped out like a cuckoo from a clock?

...and another thing

The people I actually feel sorry for however, are those who genuinely lived a life away from media’s superficial glare only to be shoved under the spotlight on death! Einstein left in his 1955 will ‘manuscripts, copyrights, royalties and all other literary property’ eventually to the Hebrew University in Jerusalem. In those days, likeness or product endorsement was as unheard of as black holes. Now the University has collected over $250m from the judicious use of the image of a man who once worried he was being paid too much ($10,000 a year)!

I of course have no such scruples. If you want to attach my face to a brand of nappies or want me to give an interview on any subject, just contact my agent. Mrs Grenside.

Stay safe.

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